2010 NFL Week 19 – Conference Championship Edition

Finally, finally Caveman exhibited his dominance over CaveKid in the Divisional playoff round. Thank you very much I posted a 3-1 record, while CaveKid found the rough and crawled to a 1-3 record. I am in full control of the second season. And just like the NFL, I would much rather be successful in the playoffs than the regular season.

It’s time to jump on the Caveman bandwagon. Well, that is if you want to end the season with three wins.

The lines are from the Las Vegas Hilton, courtesy of covers.com.

Here is the back of the Caveman player card:

Career Playoff Record (1995-2010): 85-75-5

Wildcard Round: 33-26-1

Divisional Round: 30-28-2

Championship Round: 16-14

Super Bowl: 6-7-2

 

2010 Playoffs: 5-3 (Last week 3-1)

CaveKid’s 2010 Playoffs: 4-4 (Last week 1-3)

Green Bay (-3.5) @ Chicago

A Cavaekid-like Elementary Logic: Bears are supposed to be hibernating at this time of year. And did you know that before a bear hibernates, they will eat a bunch of moss, bark and other material to prevent themselves from defecating during hibernation. Yea, that’s right they eat enough indigestible material to form a butt plug. Imagine the amount of feces that builds up during hibernation, it’s safe to assume you don’t want to be around when the bear appears and drops a deuce. Now given all that, can you really pick the Bears? At this time of year? No way!

Celebrity Pick of the Week: Early in the week news broke that Brett Favre picked the Packers, to which I immediately thought “nice try to reverse jinx the Packers, Brett”, but you know what I think Brett is actually trying to make nice with the Packers fan base. I think he realizes that he doesn’t want to turn out like Roger Clemens, who has backing from, count’em, zero fan bases. The Red Sox fans hate him, the Yankees fans never bought into him and have subsequently disowned him. Favre is in a similar position, in that the Packers fans have turned, viciously, on him. He can either be abandoned like the Riggins boys or start a political campaign to get back in the good graces with the Cheeseheads.

Look I’ve ripped since he started this ridiculous pre-season pattern of “no-yes-maybe-yes-no-no-yes”. He also hasn’t put it out on the field as he has destroyed two seasons with poor play and ended two other seasons with “ice pick to the scrotum” interceptions. Then there is the assuming, inappropriate text messages sent to an employee of the team (in fairness who hasn’t sent pictures of their junk to a cute co-worker). Favre’s turned into a parody of himself and pretty much needs to be in full-on ass-kiss mode to get back in the Packers good graces.

In a vain attempt to trump Favre, President Obama came out with a bold prediction on Wednesday, calling the Bears a lock to win. Hmmm, I’d like to jump on the Obama bandwagon with that pick, but I have a tough time taking this pick serious when Obama has the Elena Kagan pick on his resume.

Gambling Over Thought: I am not sure this is an over-thought, but the spread is way too high for teams this close. And the public is jumping all over the Packers. I feel compelled to bring out the 2000 and 2008 NFC Championship games, where two 3.5 point home team underdogs won outright (Giants and Cardinals).

Logic: The Bears are as good as the Packers. They beat them at home earlier in the year, then with the Packers season on the line the Bears gave the Pack all they could handle. In addition, I’ve seen fields in South Central LA in better shape than the turf at Soldier Field. That is a major problem for the Packers, since they’re the faster, more athletic team.

Caveat: Jay Cutler gets picked on the Bears first two possessions, giving the Packers an early lead and taking the crowd out of the game. The Bears are not equipped to play from

Pick: Chicago +3.5

CaveKid’s Pick: Chicago +3.5, “The Bears will defiantly win this one straight up. The Bears defense will shut the Packers down and ultimately score more points.”

NY Jets @ Pittsburgh (-2.5)

Cavekid’s Elementary Logic: Big Ben plays quarterback for the Steelers, but Big Ben is also a clock in London. A clock against an advanced machine like a Jet, not close!

Celebrity Pick of the Week: I sampled a ton of predictions on this game, the recurring theme was the Steelers by 4 points. However, there was one pick by a D-List celebrity that caught my eye. Craig “the Milk” Carton, a shock-jock from NY, picked the Jets to win 23-0. Hopefully, he didn’t bet another walk across the Brooklyn Bridge in a Speedo.

Gambling Over Thought: Consider the following – The Steelers did not have Troy Polamalu and Heath Miller available for their week 15 game against the Jets; both are playing this weekend; the Jets returned a kickoff for a touchdown and recorded a safety (the worst offensive play call of the 2010 NFL season), both of those events tend to be random. Given those factors – how does this line go from 5.5 in week 15 to 3.5 this week? Let’s throw in the Jets coming off the second biggest win in their history with the high likelihood of a letdown and how is this line not something like 6 or even 7?

Logic: Polamalu makes a huge difference for the Steelers; much is being made of the Jets beating Manning and Brady in consecutive weeks, but those two are statuesque compared with Roethlisberger, who’s ability to extend plays will give the Jets big problems. Plus, I will buy slightly into the Jets letdown theory. And finally, it’s the Jets, man, the Jets! They wouldn’t be the Jets if they won games like this.

Caveat: If the Steelers fall behind 21-7, the Jets will not bail them out with poor play-calling like the Ravens did.

Pick: Pittsburgh -3.5

CaveKid’s Pick: Pittsburgh -3.5, “The Steelers are out for revenge this time around. Having home field advantage will help them win too.”